In the first 7 years of Kathleens life, I spent many hours making phone calls, sending e-mails, sending news letters and pictures, and trying to force her bio-dad to have a relationship with her. He wanted nothing to do with her, he rejected every invite I sent. So, I started to reach out to her Grandparents.
I come from a huge Italian based family, and my mother side isn't Italian, but they are so close that I really, REALLY wanted Kat to experience that huge family life. After feeling like a stalker, and backing off, I got an e-mail from Kats father's Girlfriend saying they wanted to come see her. yes, his GIRLFRIEND.
I thought this was all a little ploy for her to not allow me to speak to JP. Well, I had no intentions of speaking to him, I wanted nothing to do with him. I wanted to sit there and let JP and Kathleen build a relationship before she got too old.
Well, she got too old. And he never grew a heart, so he never got to know her.
Well, here we are, living in a wonderful home, with my husband, who calls Kathleen his own, and who Kathleen loves and calls Daddy.
But here is where i really get mad....
This last Tuesday (9/18/2012), I had to go to court for a finally hearing on custody of Kathleen. Who was I sitting in the court room with? JP. Well, I spilled everything - how he has never called, never visited, how he isnt around for the visits with his parents, how he is not involved with Kat's schooling, etc.
He played a good role..... The Dad who isnt allowed to be involved, the Dad who tries so hard (but has no data to back it up), the Dad who was refused to sign the Birth Certificate, the Dad who was too far away to visit when he so badly wanted to. Well, the Judge saw right through all of it, and called him out on it too. When asked why he never visits, never calls, never inquires, yet wants custody, he admitted - he doesn't, its his parents.
The bastard.
He has no idea what he is missing out on. He has no idea how amazing this little girl is! He will never know what an amazing person she is, what an amazing, HUGE heart she has!
I've talked to her about spending time with JP, and I've asked her how she feels about it. I have asked "Do you want to call and talk to him?" on Fathers day, or Christmas, or any other Holiday, and the answer is always the same - "No, thats ok." I always ask her why she doesn't want to, and her answer is always the same - "He isnt my Dad. Andrew is my Daddy. JP doesnt do daddy things, Daddy does Daddy things."
There were things said in court, by JP and comments made by his parents which I wont put here. Not only because I dont want to relive them, but I never want Kathleen to know what those things are.
Right now, I am just so happy, so blessed, and so in love with my family I have right here in my home.
Kathleen, Andrew, and Myself.
We don't need him.
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